I have come to the conclusion that this year has sucked. It hasn't sucked as bad as other years per se.. but its up there. It's been filled with more disappointment than I thought I could handle, and I feel like the way I used to be.. the Old Maritess.. is finally gone. No remnants of my Good self remains.
I always have such high hopes and high expectations.. of myself.. of situations.. of family and friends.. but somehow.. I'm always disappointed. And it annoys me to no end. I can't do anything about it. It's Karma. I'm an evil, evil person. I wish I could escape from everything, but I can't do it without hurting others.
I just want to start over, clean slate.